am i sick?

yesterday, while at work, i felt dizzy again. though i can still stay up, i knew that when i go home i'm going to puke like hell again. after staying under the sun with my mentees because they were excited to play frisbee, i decided to take my afternoon nap at work (i stopped taking my PM naps ever since Reagan and Emman became my officemates hahaha!). The 45 minute nap helped a little but there was still this faint dizziness lurking. I left the two boys not feeling extremely well. While at the jeepney on my way home, I got shaken and was sweating profusely. opening my eyes worsen the situation as i become dizzier than before. I managed to get home without damaging any man made elements but our toilet bowl experienced the fury. I vomitted everything I ate from 10AM onwards. Jaims was nice enough to take care of Sofi while I take a nap again. But Sofi has her means of letting me know she cared too. She went inside our closet and got me a shirt. She was also trying to wake me up but her dad stopped her. i woke up at past 7 still feeling woozy. I thought maybe we should eat so I can replenish all the nutrients i've lost. I thought it was over but after eating i still feel bad. Jaims bougth my usual hyperacidity medicine, Maalox Plus. I ended vomitting everything i ate AGAIN. I didn't finish watching Only You and left my babies at the sala so I could sleep.

I woke up at the sound of my alarm at 5.30 today. it's holiday but I decided maybe i should eat. So I grabbed bread and coffee before i start surfing.

How many times have this happened? If I have to check my school record, it would reflect that hyperacidity has been the reason for my absences. Or at least, if you check with my officemates this is one thing they'd tell you. R & E said yesterday that maybe I'm pregnant again. But I already had 3 negative pregnancy test sent to the dump site in the last few weeks. Maybe that tells me something. i was talking to mama this morning and she was telling me the results of her test -- high sugar, high BP and high cholesterol levels. And before she left me she said maybe I should have my levels checked too. She said I've been experiencing these bouts of hilo and suka several times.  I felt like watching a telenovela in that scene wherein before a commercial gap the mother will leave a few lines before leaving Judy Ann Santos;  camera zooms on her face and after 10 minutes of zooming a tear or two will fall and cut -- commercial. HAHAHHA!  No, i didn't cry but it made me think.  When i opened facebook, I looked at God's message to me and it said "that you cannot wait anymore". 

On this day of your life, Sarah, we believe God wants you to know...
... that you cannot wait anymore.

The moment has finally come. You have no choice. You have to take that step now. Now. Not tomorrow, not in an hour, - Now! If anyone else is reading this, they would be confused. But not you. You know exactly what we mean. Do it. Now.

 Sometimes it's weird to let a computer program decide for your life but somehow the messages from this program hits the spot.  Or maybe I'm just missing a lot of God-time that God has been knocking on my door.